just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Let's get the cat blown out
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
