You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
