This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
