ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
