am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
