And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
is it fun? or sober?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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