Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
