hotel room ftw
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
