Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize