the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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