My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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