I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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