Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Randomize