By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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