My room smells like vodka and shame
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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