I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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