so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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