Sry I called you an 8
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
