i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
