I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize