the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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