it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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