i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
