Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
