I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
