The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You're a waste of cheezeits
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
