you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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