I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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