I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a beard to bite.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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