Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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