I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
