The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
