I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize