Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize