hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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