we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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