I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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