No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize