Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize