Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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