my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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