now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
meet me or not, i'm out of control
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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