I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Randomize