sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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