My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
