is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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