R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
