No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
