You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize