he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Randomize
